We’ve been getting pretty busy this week getting ready for the party on Saturday. We have the grocery list, the menu planned and the music hired. You would not believe how hard it is to nail down music. And,even after explaining several times that crazy wouldn’t play acoustic without the mf-ing drummer no-itwouldntbethesamewithouthedrummerwecantdoitwecant I was finally able to get on an online service that you can put in your information and what you want. For example: SOMEONE TO MF-ING PLAY GUITAR AND SING A LITTLE IS THAT SO HARD?
And, then several people call back saying, Heeeeey man, I got your info from Gareth and he said you were looking for someone, maaaaaan? Like, right-on, right-on!
Suddenly, I felt like I had randomly given out my number to publishers clearing house along with saying I would subscribe to 100 magazines. I ended up hiring a guy who is a music teacher and composer and he’s bringing his wife to sing while he plays guitar. I hope they’re ok. I listened to some of his wife’s samples and she sounded good but she sang an Ella Fitzgerald –It Don’t Mean a Thing if it Ain’t got that Swing song and I had to email him and tell him to lose the “do0wap-doowap-doowap” song. I mean, we’re not 100 years old, here.
Anyway, for $200 I can’t complain. I have other things to think about to complete before Saturday. Charlie and I took the day off on Monday because I know we’ll both be exhausted.
My father and stepmother stepped up and sent us a card with a check in it for $100. I about fell over. I’m sure my step mother has been working on my father about this. Maybe she even snuck the check out of the joint account checkbook and sent it to spite him, who knows. I know it’s her writing on the card – as is all the cards I ever receive from them. My sister is still not back from Europe but I haven’t returned the last three of her emails. She has deduced now that she’s going to buy Charlie and I plane tickets to fly up to Indiana so she can have a party at her house and invite the whole family.
If I wanted my entire family at my commitment ceremony and/or reception I would have mf-ing invited them. The last time she threw me a party she had me helping her make all the food and then run around the party filling everyone’s glass up (because all my relatives are too fat and lazy to get their own mf-ing glasses filled). I’m not doing that again. I’ve had several little fits and eruptions since I read that email but one of the reasons I haven’t responded is that if I can’t say anything nice then I just won’t say anything at all. Once I calm down a little about it I will politely say that Charlie and I are fully engaged until, like, the next century and we have no time to fly to Indiana for a party thanks anyway.