negative/positive vice versa

It’s been a week. Despite my impending unemployment I’ve been working a lot lately on self promotion, resumes, cover letters along with school work. It’s really hard going into the office every day. I’m just trying to bide my time. The other guys I work with have been ok -it’s just work in general that has sucked.

The other day I had a meeting with my current boss, Dan. I’m not sure I wrote about this but our old boss, Baxter, got moved out to bum-f*ck to manage another team. Lucky them is all I could say. Then, they brought a new guy in who is about 10 years my junior to run the group. I will say he’s a really nice but clueless.  I called a meeting with him because I wanted to make sure he’s going to give me a good review, recommendation and that I can use him as a reference for future jobs. All that was a yes, I have no worries he will give me a decent recommendation if someone calls him. So, while we were meeting he told me he’s going to go ahead and do my yearly review that day and we’ll go over it. Great! You know how long I had to chase Baxter down to do my review last year? I called and emailed him to ask when he was going to do it and he blew me off and waited until 4:00 pm on a Friday of the last day he had to turn them in to call me with it. So, you get the idea how much of a jerk this guy was.

Later in the day, Dan tells me he’s finished with my review and asks if I want to go over it. I said, Sure. So he asked me what I felt my accomplishments were in the last year. I thought, Ok, this is going to be like a job interview. So, I rattled off some things I had accomplished with my wirecenter, designs, continuing education, etc. Because the company had been spouting off all this BS of continuing education to get “2020” ready. What a load! Obviously that’s total bullshit.  After I was finished I was waiting for him to start in on my review. I’m like, Just give it to me and let’s get this over with. He starts by saying that since he’s only managed me for a short time and since Baxter managed us 7 months out of the year he called him for feedback.

My heart sank. I knew what he was going to say. Baxter has always had a grudge against me for some reason. Because I’m a female working in a man’s world? Because I don’t take shit from anyone? Because I’m a strong female? Who knows. So, he reads me what Baxter said and then reads the portion of what he wrote which I couldn’t even hear because I seeing red over what Baxter said-“that I needed to communicate better with clients and developers and that relaying on others has slowed my development in grasping key concepts and processes”.

What.thefuck.was.that? I just sat there and then made him read it again. I couldn’t believe it. I have done nothing but work on my own since I started this job. There was no training, no mentoring, nothing. Baxter never even answered his emails let alone held my hand in doing anything. I told Dan that I didn’t feel that was fair. He just shrugged his shoulders and said that he had written positive things after that. I was like,Yeah but you can’t take away a negative with a positive.   

Then he went on to say that I could reject the review. Yeah, I know how that goes – HR ends up eventually overriding it and it gets posted anyway. It’s a no-win situation. So, I told him I was going to look at it but that I would probably sign off on it regardless. I didn’t want to look at it after that.  I knew if I looked at it I would throw something and I just needed to get out of there and go home. So, I did.

Yesterday, I opened it and read it and was steamed once again. Right below their comments was a box for employees comments so I wrote the following:

I do not agree with the following comments from the Overall Comments section which are “Lanie needs to work on communicating in a timely fashion with developers/customers.” And, “Relaying on others has slowed her development in grasping key concepts and processes.”

Both of these statements are inaccurate – I communicate daily with developers/customers as well as work independentely on my ongoing projects. I have never relied on others for my professional development or growth. I have only sought out more senior members of my team as mentors to answer questions and seek advice. My current team has never been collaborative so I have had to relay on myself to solve complex problems.

I want to add that I am the only member of my team that has a professional project management certification at PMP  and is seeking higher education in cybersecurity. I am constantly growing my skills and accomplishments and striving to meet professional goals.

Then, after I made sure it was saved and signed the damn thing. Let Baxter and Dan read that. I was professional – unlike Baxter. The whole thing just made me want to get the hell out of there. As I was driving to school I wanted to just blow it off and go drink somewhere. Seriously, I was thinking, When does all this shit end? I can answer that – March 29th when my stint is done and my severance kicks in unless I get an offer prior to Feb 18th but I don’t think that’s going to happen. I had a meeting set up with the internship department to go over my resume and match it to some of the IT related jobs I wanted to go for so I didn’t want to miss that and I’m so glad I didn’t. The lady I had the appointment with, Malika, sat down with me in her bosses office to start editing my resume. The resume the outsoucing coaches had guided me on had a lot of problems with it. First of all, the objective that they suggested I use had all these run-on sentences and used outdated lingo like “track record”. So, Malika and I got to work deconstructing it and her boss, Phoebe,  was looking over our shoulders while we did it and I happened to pull out the job announcement for a role that I’m interviewing for next week. Phoebe looked at it and said, By all means lets go over your interview and started firing off interview questions. We went through the whole thing and the two of them guided me on the things I should say. It was a totally meaningful workshop – really, much better than the career outsourcing company that my former company contracts to coach people they cut loose. Granted I’ve been to a lot of their things too but working with Malika and Phoebe felt more personalized. As I packed up to go to class I scheduled another session with them the following week. Then, I walked into class and my prof – who is a security engineer with Verison said we would be subnetting that evening. Even though I don’t have a solid grasp of it I love doing it. I love writing out the IP addresses and breaking it down to how many hosts per subnets, how many available IP addresses per host, etc. He taught us the way he does it which was a lot better than any of the other ways I’d ever learned it. My classmate who I had intro to networking with last summer said this was the best way he’d ever learned it too. The prof made each of us get up and subnet an address on the board. It was great but by the end of class I was really fried. I’d been through so many emotions that day, went from one thing to the other that I just wanted to go home and drink a beer and decompress. I was seriously spent and still a little emotional over work shit. I won’t let them keep me down. I am going to fucking move the hell on to a better place if it kills me and I’m going to nail that fucking interview next week.

 

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friends won’t be around

You know, I used to worry about moving away from Hotlanta because I would miss all the friends I had. (Notice I said HAD?) But now, I worry more about eating at the same BBQ place down the road as it being the only place for 50 miles. I worry about driving for miles to go grocery shopping. I don’t worry about having a dock to sit on nor starting up the boat for a quick run around the lake before getting on a conference call.

I guess it’s a balance. I do love our home and we’ve finally been able to turn our carport into a garage blocking the remaining views from our unsightly neighbors. (This would be another reason I wouldn’t mind moving – to get away from them). But, back to friends – lesbians here suck. They do. Our straight friends are way easier to manage than the lesbians. There’s always drama there. We have these one friends who are friends with everyone simply because they just don’t care. If someone goes off and doesn’t call them for a year and then reappears they are fine with it. Charlie and I aren’t like that. I guess we expect more from people why we don’t have a lot of friends, I guess. I’d rather have quality friends I can depend on then some fly-by-night friends that I drank with occasionally. I guess my standards are too high.

This one friend, Link, ghosted us for 5 months. When she got back she was trying to get together with us. We were like, Hello. We hadn’t heard from you. You hadn’t answered our phone calls, texts, nothing. No, we don’t want to see you because we’re upset with you. You can’t just fall in to “Let’s go out and drink and have a good time” because we’re pissed.

I mean, wouldn’t that piss you off?

So Link has to use our other friends against us. We asked Rooster over for chili and football and she begged off saying she didn’t feel well but would try to make it. So, the next day, chili bubbling in the crockpot and we see that Rooster had checked in on Facebook to watch football with Link, Dino and Martha.

You know, if she didn’t want to hang with us she should have said she had other plans. Simple as that. You don’t have to lie about it and say you’re sick. Link’s also pissed that we still hang with Stiletto – yeah, we do because she answers her damn phone. She’s a FRIEND. We’re not taking sides here from their breakup. Stiletto’s been a friend, Link has not been a friend.

But, I think some people just don’t know the difference. They just don’t get it. Some people are just ok to have fair weather friends. That’s ok, though, really. Different strokes for different folks but you don’t have to be rude about it. We have enough on our plates as it is. I have SQL and firewalls to get thru this semester so I don’t have a lot of time for bullshit. So, I’m off Facebook, stupid ex-friends, carbs and after yesterday – football.

 

Baby, it’s [raining] cold outside

Saturday was the last day of school for the semester as well as two final exams. UGH! For the second Saturday in a row I drove in pouring rain to class. The weather here has just sucked lately – I can’t remember this much rain last year. So, I didn’t do well at all on my Cisco exam. I was pretty bummed about that. I have no idea why they offer practice exams if none of the questions are going to be on the actual exam – which, they weren’t. I totally studied the wrong stuff and ended up with a terrible score that sunk my grade to a C. At least the next final in my security class went well and I think I have an A going in there. So, on to the certification exam next weekend. I don’t even want to think about that right now. I plan on cramming all next week for it.

By the time all that was over I was ready to blow off some steam. We had tickets to see Charlie Mars at Edie’s and Emil was going with. I had another friend who was supposed to go bail at the last minute and had to eat the ticket but whatever -she’s off my invite list for AWHILE. But, we had fun without her and for once Edie’s wasn’t packed to the gills – we kind of felt like we were in our own little private show. There’s something to be said for going there when it’s pouring rain and Atlanta United is playing in their cup game. We managed to catch the last bit of the win after the show. It’s nice that Atlanta has one sports team that can bring it.

Last night, we had peeps coming over to help us eat this huge lasagna we’ve had in the freezer. I think so far we have 9 confirmed and maybe a 10th. I went to the farmers market later that day and picked up stuff to make a salad- which, turned out to be a hit. I think goat cheese and pears are in my future. It was kind of an early Christmas dinner as Charlie and I don’t really have any plans for the holiday. While it was hard to get into the spirit with rain pouring down outside the dinner was very cheery and everyone seemed to have a good time.

So, nothing really became of that interview I had a few weeks back. The guy said he would call on Friday, never did. I sent him and email to check in last week and he said he’d be in touch in a few days, never did. So, at this point I’m going to stick it out until bonus time and start working on my independent projects with my security mentors at my current job. They’re going to offer another retirement package come February so I believe that I’m going to lose both my coworkers to that. One is retiring and the other wants out. He’s seriously job hunting right now. I told him if he leaves before me then I want his office. So, pretty soon it could just be me sitting up there in the central office. Granted, I’d love for the one coworker to retire because he’s a bit annoying. But, the other is going to be a blow because he knows so much. There won’t be anyone around to answer questions once he’s gone.

So, on to more studying! You probably won’t see me until after December 15th. Happy Holidays!

 

 

 

 

 

my day as it compared to “Ironic”

You ever had one of those days where you could have just stayed in bed. Maybe in hindsight you should have decided to take a mental health day?

Yesterday was one of those. Freaking Mondays, I swear. I felt kind of like this guy. Despite sleeping the best that I’ve slept for a while the previous night and coming in to work on the later side of what I normally do I could tell it was going to be one of those days right after I got in.

I have this one guy I share an office with and when he’s in a bad mood it’s time to put the headphones on and zone out. I was doing just that and thinking, If I were to get that one job that I interviewed for and that I should be hearing back any day from then maybe all my coworkers would be HAPPY and we’d all be working as A TEAM and saying things like, Hey, let’s head on over and discuss this work solution over a game of pool after we clear out the yoga mats from the class that just ended.

See what I mean?

Instead, I happen to look at my phone and see that I had a missed phone call. From California. And, oh a message of – thanks for coming in but we’re moving forward with other candidates at this time.

Fuck.

I was sitting there thinking, Well, you did just buy this expensive laptop to do school work on and made an investment to stay in school which your current job pays for and if you were to get this then you may have had to drop some classes, drop out or be so crazy busy you’d be stressed out.

It’s a black fly in your Chardonnay. It’s a death row pardon two minutes too late.

You know – making analogies. But, it still fucking sucked. I spent almost 6 hours talking to these people. Geez. I should at least get a t-shirt. The I showed up for an onsite interview with [large tech company] and all I got was this t-shirt. But, I brushed it off and went on despite my workmate yelling into the phone in the background and being slightly pissed off.

It’s like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife……

So, I had my Linux class that night. Which, I gotta tell you has not started out well. The curriculum required an expensive book and lab access then once purchased no one seemed to be able to sync it with the school’s grading system nor can some even get into it. The professor knows DICK about what to do about it. He’s this guy who only wants to teach command line in a virtual environment. Fine, teach that but don’t require us to spend $150 on expensive online lab access if we’ll never be able to be graded on it. I went in last night hoping that the kinks would be worked out and it was the same as the previous weeks. I was actually trying to help the guy behind me and then he asked that wacka-doodle woman next to him if she got the same thing and she said her labs had been graded already (which that was my email to the prof as to why mine were still processing) and when the guy asked her how she did it she snapped, I’m not up for helping anyone right now. I was thinking, Wow then you should have not said anything to begin with. I mean, no need to be rude, bitch. I think the guy even got up and left. I have no idea. So the prof lectured for an hour – ½ without a break. I got up and went to the restroom and came back just as he was saying he would end lecture then and we can work on the lab. I did the lab – which was different that the one I had already done – I figure I will eventually get graded on some things that I’ve done – and left.

It’s a free ride, when you’ve already paid…….

So, when I got home Charlie had gotten the mail and finally the card that my sister sent for my birthday with money in it got here (I might say, almost a month late) and guess what? Someone had already torn open the envelope and stole the cash out of it.

And, isn’t it ironic, don’t you think.

A little too ironic, and yeah I really do think.

just another chex mix friday

(this is what Georgia feels like right now)

Last Thursday, I had a day-long interview –can’t really disclose anything about it but let’s just say I felt it went well and I was ready for a drink afterwards to, if anything, celebrate making it through. I probably won’t hear anything for a couple of weeks if I do.

I’m at a juncture right now with what I want to do. If I were to get this job it would mean growing in the profession I’m currently in and I would probably have to put school on hold or reduce my load to one class because I’d have to jump in with both feet. It would be a great opportunity for sure.

If I don’t get the job then I’m going to just continue to tread water where I am and go to school. So, really no skin off my nose either way – that is, unless we go through a lay-off in September like people are saying could happen -they like to call it “surplus”.

School started Monday night – YAWN – I was so tired. My first class of the semester – Linux. When I walked into the building I recognized a classmate I had in networking last semester – Nancy – she was down the hall in a security class I’ve already taken. She has this Linux class, too, but on another night. We talked about how we were clueless about the textbook and lab access for the class, etc. When I walked into the room there was another classmate from my first semester in Hardware and Maintenance. She’s a bit of a wack-a-doodle but very helpful in figuring out how to access the labs. Between her and another guy they figured it out and by the end of the class we were in. But, it was 8:00 by then and the prof let us go. The labs alone are going to take a while to do we were told. Here we go again. I’m sure I’m going to have labs coming out of my @ss this semester as I have two more classes back to back on Saturdays.

What have I gotten myself in to, is what I keep thinking.

In the meantime, I’m still studying for that Network + exam that I guess I’m going to bite the bullet and go sit for it by the end of this month because this version of the exam that I’ve been studying for is going away. Our prof was talking about Linux certification and I was like, Not now, dude. Maybe down the road but I don’t see it. Probably next is Security +. I’m just trying to get enough IT knowledge down so I can be a project manager for IT related projects – I don’t need to be the IT person.

So, Larry and Sherry got into trouble. They took vacation together to move in together this week and didn’t tell anyone. Normally, when we take vacation days or if we’re going to be out of the office we’re supposed to put in into this system that shows we’re out. That way if anyone’s looking for us then they go there and see that we’re out. If we’re managing an area then we need to put in a backup person to handle that while we’re out. As Sherry just does ADMIN work (even though she’s being paid to be an engineer) she doesn’t have to put anyone down. But, Larry is managing three areas (he got two of Patricia’s areas after she quit left) and he put no one down t handle his shit. This is very bad from the company standpoint. We cannot take vacation or be out if there’s no one to cover our shit.

I always have Chris cover me when I’m out. I even coordinate my vacation days with his to make sure both of us can cover each other while we’re out. The new boss has said that he’s going to be going to each office to work a day or so and wants to coordinate with everyone those days – meaning, he doesn’t want to show up at an office to work when no one is going to be there – like he did on Thursday when he showed up to Larry and Sherry’s office and no one was there. Not good for them but Baxter let them get away with murder while he was a manager so I’m not surprised that they have never imputed their stuff into the system when they were out.

Since the new boss has taken over snarky dickhead that sits out in the OTP office has been killing us with spreadsheets. I almost feel I’m back at the Wanna-build-roads-but-only-throw-people-under-the-bus place. Granted, no job is perfect but it would be nice if more than one person on the team would take on more of a mentor role instead of the mentality of “This is your shit, handle it.” The job I interviewed for last week I had to meet “The Team” and it was all about collaboration and working as “a team”. I wanted to laugh because none of the jobs I’ve ever been in had that mentality. Oh, they SAID they were a team but mostly it’s been here’s some shit, handle it type of mentality.

We don’t have big plans for the weekend – especially since I will be in class most of the day on Saturday and it’s Charlie’s last weekend until she goes out of town on a trip with her mom. I think we plan on just laying low and staying close to the house – especially, since, Bailey, one of our dogs gave us a scare on Wednesday. Charlie was walking her and Sadie and Bailey got into a yellow jacket nest and got stung a couple of times and went into shock. Charlie called me at work to come get them and take them to the vet but when I got on the road there was all this school traffic and I called her back and told her to call Heather up the street and I would meet them at the vet. So, once there Bailey got a shot of Benadryl and Cerenia and then fluids. She seemed to be stabilizing pretty quick and we took her home and laid her down on the couch and put the TV on for her. Poor thing. So, now we’re looking in to possibly a liquid form of Benadryl and some more Cerenia for the doggie first aid kit.

So, it’s been kind of an exciting week and 1/2. How has yours been? What’s up for the weekend?

Cheers!

Vacation recap

We had a great time in Brunswick and on Jekyll island. We rented this cute little house off Air BnB that had a completely fenced in yard with with a fire ring on one side and a seating area and grill on the other side. Unfortunately it rained every evening so we didn’t get much if a chance to take advantage of it. But every morning on the beach was nice. Our friend, Benita, came up for a night and went to driftwood beach with us. Here are some photos:

We really couldn’t have asked for a better trip!

gone are the days

Why is it when I have a hangover  I’m awake at an ungodly hour? Everyone else is sleeping away their hangovers except me and the cat. The cat is bitching at me right now to be fed. I’m ignoring him. He can wait. I have important shit to write.

Last night, we all met up at the pub for Martha’s birthday. It was a surprise party that Dino had arranged. She called earlier in the week and ordered us to be there and asked if I would make sure Link knew about it. I was like, I’ll tell her but she can call or text that she’s coming herself. I’m not planning shit these days because between my two classes I don’t have time for anything but working on the assignments and trying to understand what the f*ck it is that I should be learning.

Of course, Mike and Celia were there. I had given myself a talk about not letting Mike get under my skin prior to getting there. Plus, Charlie’s ex gf was there because she’s met Martha all of two times and thinks they’re bosom buds. We knew J-mac was going to be there and just said, Oh well. I invited B Ferris because I knew that Martha would want her there and vice versa. Link had ridden over with us and Stiletto had shown up later to buffer join the party. Both Rooster and Shutter came as well.

So, when we walked up of course Celia was outside smoking with her and Mikes live-in Sarah (who is very strange) I really didn’t want to hug them because I didn’t want cigarette smoke on me but I did.  We went in and sat down – fortunately, there were a lot of seats to choose from so we ended up sitting at the opposite end of the table than J-mac. Mike just happened to be sitting in the middle and by the time Martha came in she took a seat at the end of the table as the head since it was her birthday leaving one chair beside Mike and a chair at the other end of the table next to me open. We were all sitting there talking and waiting for B Ferris and Christie to come before ordering food.

Dino came over to say that she was glad that I invited B Ferris as she said it wasn’t on her radar. It’s been almost a year to date since the whole nudity situation from Martha’s last birthday. I’m still not over it entirely. I still think, If you ever touch my wife again there WILL be consequences. 

Just then, B Ferris walks in and plops down in the chair beside me after hugging Charlie and I. That’s when Mike lost her shit.

YOU CAN’T SIT THERE BECAUSE CHRISTIE IS STILL COMING AND SHE’S VERY FAT AND WONT BE ABLE TO SIT IN BETWEEN ME AND [SHUTTER] HERE.

Every time Mike speaks its like a shout. Not sure if she needs to be fitted for hearing aids or what. And, how disrespectful to Christie talking about her weight like that at a full table of people. I’m sure if Christie would have known that she would have been mortified.

B Ferris just looked at her and went to get up and said, I don’t think so I want to sit here.

YOU CAN’T SIT THERE THAT’S CHRISTIE’S SEAT! YOU NEED TO COME SIT OVER HERE NOW.

I was getting pissed. I put my hand on B Ferris who was looking like she wanted to burst into tears and said, It’s ok stay here. 

B Ferris had just lost a beloved cat and was having a rough time so I’m sure Mike’s outburst caused even more distress. I was about to shout at Mike to cut her some slack she’d just lost a cat but I was afraid that would push Ferris over the brink and she’d leave and I wanted her to stay. Rooster and Shutter also chimed in that they could make room when Christie gets there no worries.

Mike then pointed at B Ferris and said, I’M NOT GOING TO FORGET THIS.

Like it was a threat or something. All I could think was WTH?! If she would have said that to me I would have been in her face so fast she wouldn’t have known what hit her.

B Ferris said, I think I need to go outside.

I knew if she went outside she’d start crying and then leave. I put my hand on her back and said, You’re fine, stay here.

I think Rooster and Shutter chimed in again that they’d make room and the subject was finally dropped and people were starting to look at Mike like she was the asshole that she is. Yeah, Link and Stiletto say it’s just because she’s from New York. I’m like I don’t care where you’re from -rude is rude. I get tired of every time we all get together either Mike is an ass or Dino has to get handsy or naked. People say, I don’t’ understand why you don’t ever want to do anything with them.

Really, people?

There are so many other friends who behave themselves and are a joy to be around why do I have to put up with that shit? Anyway, we all got through it but if I have to hang out with them in the future I’m going to start calling them out on their shit. If Mike starts talking rude to me or someone else I’m going say, Mike stop being rude and call her out. If Dino decides to grab my wife’s crotch like she did at Rooster and Shutters show that one time I’m going to immediately get in her face and say That’s not appropriate, keep your hands to yourself. Gone are the days of not saying anything. I mean, sheesh, am I being unreasonable here?

I have two more freaking days until vacation. WHOOP! I need it! I’ve been working on what seems like 100 labs to get ahead in school so I won’t have to be hitting the books while we’re gone. If I don’t talk to you before then I will see you on the flip-side. Cheers!

 

 

glad that’s over

I’m glad last weekend is over. I had the memorial service for my friend on Saturday and then met out for drinks after.

The service itself was very odd & sad. There were 6 ex-girlfriends of Alex’s there (kind of amazing it wasn’t a shit show). I was sitting in between gf #1 (who Alex was with when I first met her) and gf #2 Stephanie, who was one of the toads. GF #3 was on the end, Rachael, and then there was GF #5 was in front of us (who was old years ago when Alex dated her and was even MORE ancient – what the heck was she thinking is what I always thought every time I saw her) and finally GF #6 who no one knew personally was sitting on the front row the immediate family. GF #6 was also married to a man and had children. Again, what was Alex thinking?

I know its bad luck to speak ill of the deceased so forgive me.

To say we couldn’t get out of there fast enough afterwards is an understatement. Alex’s mom remembered me but when I said I was one of the toads she said, Yeah, she had that tattoo removed years ago.

I thought, probably, because of you, too.

We met up at Joe’s on Juniper later for many drinks and to reminisce old times. We laughed a lot which was nice. Afterwards, we hugged goodbye and I could tell Rachael was getting teary eyed. I’m not sure I’ll ever see those ladies again to be honest. Now we have this wedge of sadness that brought us all together again that I’m not sure we’ll ever get over.

Sunday, as we all know was Mother’s Day and is always a very difficult day for me especially after losing my stepmother this past summer. I was thinking, Can I just get a break? When will this weekend be over? That’s why I purposely planned a crab boil and invited Link, Benji and Goya over. I needed something to take my mind off of things. Stiletto ended up coming back from SC early so she joined us as well so we ended the weekend on a high note at least.

This week school started back up again so it’s kind of a relief to have something to take my mind off of everything and focus.

no dice no d*ck

I admit I haven’t written in a while – well, except for that last rant I left up for a day or so then felt guilty about it and made it private. Sometimes I should just shut up  and change the behavior instead of ranting about it on here. But, it is my blog and I feel entitled to rant a little because if people don’t like it they can go read about Trump on CNN or something.

I finished up Spring semester in school with a 95% in both classes and an IT fundamentals certification. Baby steps, I know. Summer semester starts up in three weeks and I hope to be ahead of the game before classes start so I can keep up. I think by the end of the Fall semester I should have enough classes and certifications under my belt that things professionally will look a lot more promising different. I won’t say that things are entirely that bad right now but things can always change quickly and like the Summer semester I want to stay ahead of the game.

We had great weather here last weekend which meant we went and did a lot. We ended up at our neighbors down the street for dinner last night and Yolanda was there as well. We hadn’t seen her since guitar classes were over. I asked if she had been playing but she said no. I said I’d been learning some songs on Fender play since then and was thinking of having a guitar practice dinner at the house sometime next week if she’d like to join but she said she’d be out of town. No, that sounds great, I cant make it this time but please include me in the next. So, I was like ok, then. I get it, you’re not interested – guitar was in the past but there’s no reason to hang out after that unless we happen to see her at our neighbors and I just skipped a whole bunch of ranting over A-gays and A-listers but instead of ranting I’m just never going to ask again. Maybe we’ll see you at the next dinner. I have too much to do to chase people down these days. Either you’re in or you’re not and if you’re not then moving on. Next.

My sister tried to call me this past weekend but I didn’t answer. If she doesn’t leave me a message then I wait and call her back the following week when she’s pushed for time and can’t talk very long. If a few times go by and it’s not urgent she will text me instead which is even better. Most of the time when I talk to her I try not to give away much information which is to my benefit. I started doing this after the whole sex change rumor my father started throughout the county I’m from. So now I don’t tell her DICK (no pun intended) so she doesn’t have anything to gossip about concerning me to our father, our relatives, anyone in the county who will listen including and not limited to the liars club that he hangs out with every morning for breakfast. I’m sure there’s people in my hometown now who are dying to know if I have a package now. Maybe out of shits and giggles the next time I go home I will pack more than a bag.

Today she texted me she was leaving the country for work and knowing she was at the airport waiting to board the plane and pressed for time I called her back. This time she was going on about our father’s cell phone service and how he tried to have our step mother’s phone shut off because she died and they wouldn’t until he showed them a death certificate. Long story short she’s putting him on her cell phone service. What. Ever. I said, I wasn’t under the impression he was talking much on his cellphone and when he gets a new phone store my number in it because he never calls me. Not that I care if he calls me but HE NEVER DOES. I told her I was tired of always having to call him because he never called me. Let’s just see if she says anything to him about it. This was only a test really to see if she would tell him what I said. If he calls me then I know for a fact she tells him everything I tell her. Anyway, that’s a family rant that I allow myself.